Andrea Delogu: "A 40-year-old single shouldn't apologize to anyone"
In a few months I will be 40 years old. Actually I had taken it well as news, I was not hurt thinking a little closer to half a century. The metabolism is no longer the same and at 11 pm I crave warm blankets and a TV series, but otherwise I didn't feel a lot of pressure. Until I suddenly, irremediably found myself SINGLE.
I've been married for nearly five years, with all that that goes with it, grafting a new family, new friends, group travel and other great things to share. Five happy years. Then my marriage ended. Explaining the reason would be complex,
but it ended and I found myself single. After a few months of pain, despair and settling, I would even risk a "happily" single, but I could not say it around because "happily single", for many, is an oxymoron. These are two words that cannot be in the same sentence. For our society, being a single woman, almost 40 years old, who does not feel the
need to be LEGITIMIZED THROUGH a family, is a DISASTER!
Because it doesn't matter if you tend to be resolved, if you have a job you love, if you have precious friends, if you are physically healthy, if you know how to do the Spid alone. It does not matter. When you're about to turn 40, play another game. That of the last cartridges to be fired. What if you're married ok, but if you're single, well, it's too late to find a man.
As if it were not conceivable to be happy even alone, without children because they did not arrive, even experiencing feelings when they occur, without looking for them.
And no, if you are a woman, then you are the weaker sex and in such a scenario for society you are screwed. Doomed. Desperate. Looking. But strangely, too rarely, among these options, the word FREE hardly ever occurs.
I am a woman and I am free.
I would never have believed that we were still so desperately tied to age-old and dangerous prejudices. Instead I saw them, I read them and I heard them proposed between the lines of some interviews or chats. The beauty of being a single woman in 2022 in Italy lies in not having to apologize to anyone, not having to give explanations, not feeling strange.
I'm about to turn 40, I'm single and maybe I won't remarry. Maybe I won't have children or maybe yes, but I want to say plainly that my life does not end here regardless of whether I have a traditional family or not. And that my prospects cannot be measured on husbands, boyfriends, lovers or children.
We are all victims of the expectations of others, but what others think is right or "normal" must never apply as a rule.
There are those who at 80 take a degree, those who at 60 decide to go to the disco or learn to skate or go out with a younger boy, which brings you a breath of lightness, with which to feel good and not have to
feel say "post separation crisis". No, I'm just fine. Simply. My name is Andrea, I am almost 40 years old and I am a happy woman.
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